MMO Troll is a gaming blog and social network where you can stalk other gamers, join guilds, upload images, and write blogs.
If you'd like to advertise with us please use the contact form and we'll provide instructions on where to drop the money. We also accept gaming merchandise, girl scout cookies (thin mint only), and nudie magazines.
We do NOT accept used condoms, half eaten sandwiches, or dirty bandaids - so please stop sending those items.
Looking For Bloggers
If you're interested in writing for the site, get in touch with us through our contact form. Payment consists of insults and borderline sexually harassing comments.
Reason behind the name: When I first started playing Ultima Online I gaily named my character "King James". Not because I was a roleplayer or anything, but because I couldn't think of anything better. I ended up player killing with another gamer named "AlNoR LoNgCoCk" (awesome, right!? good luck getting that name through your carebear MMO name filter today) and we ended up taking a few stat loss rez's and decided to work up new player killers. I became "Grim" and he became "Reaper".
MMOs: I've been addicted to MMO's since I was introduced to Ultima Online at a summer internship in 97. [Fun fact - the guy that got me hooked was later fired for sending a picture of a pierced genitals via work email. I guess you could say he sent black and never came back…] Since then I have played Everquest 1 & 2, Lineage 2, Final Fantasy XI & XIV, World of Warcraft, Lord of the Rings Online, Warhammer Online, Age of Conan, and Rift to varying degrees of addiction.
Hobbies: Programming, Gaming, Reading. Basically the trifecta of nerdom. It really is a wonder I'm not still a virgin. I've got proof - genital warts don't just appear on their own you know.
Goals: To make money off of the hard work and intellectual property of others. Just kidding. Sort of.
IRL Job: Software Developer at a large corporation.
Bio: This site is my hobby project and soap box. For the past decade I've provided free services (guildtools.net, slashwho.com, guildtag.com) to gamers as a means to learn new technologies and claw my way up the corporate ladder. It worked out pretty well for me, so I've decided to end my free services and instead make fun of nerds that play video games.
Reason behind the name: For those of you not schooled in the classics, Priapus was the Greek god of male virility and erections. He also had a giant wang.
MMOs: World of Warcraft, yeah that’s it. Never played one before and have never tried another. I am afraid to, lest I end up like Grim.
Hobbies: Yachting mainly, and the occasional chucker of polo. There are others, but we both know you don’t give a shit.
Goals: To become a James Bond super-villain. No seriously. Did you ever watch those movies? Especially the older ones? Those guys had the coolest shit, a manservant who could dispatch pesky foes via decapitation with a steel brimmed hat, underwater mansions, blimps, Drax even lived in Vaux-le-Vicomte. I don’t care how you spin it, they balled hard. They also always had really exotic and hot girlfriends, with exception of the one dude who was trying to bone the 15 year-old figure skater. That was just creepy.
IRL Job: Long story short, I am an investment banker. No, I did not engineer the near collapse of our financial system. You can thank you mortgage broker for that. I am in research. It’s a thankless job that involves long hours and most of what I produce can’t be understood by peons like you.
Bio: Born in a place where the weak are killed and eaten (Detroit) I grew up in a mix of the lily-white suburbs and the street. Honing my business skills on the streets of the D and refining my social graces and politicking in the yacht clubs and country clubs of the suburbs. I can move seamlessly through any social strata. Eventually went to several colleges and paying my way through with a mix of odd jobs such as: kicking squatters out of foreclosed homes in Detroit, driving around strippers, professional sailor, and bartending. Then I made the biggest mistake of my life, I graduated from college and started getting “real” jobs. From this point on I have become much like a hooker, dead inside.
Reason behind the name: I took a break from finding new and exciting ways to sneak names through the filter and somehow decided "Zeuro" was a good start.
MMOs: I had dabbled with a few MUD games before; but, thanks to my (then) roommate, I've been addicted to MMO's since the introduction of EQ. Oh the triumphant feeling of killing bixies in the Misty Thicket. The disappointment of yelling "camp check" and getting "raster" in response. The woes of Flowers of Happiness killing you and taking your favorite pants. Over all, I've been through EQ (Blue, Red, and RP servers), EQ2, and currently WoW (PvP, RPPvP, and Normal servers).
Hobbies: Include, but are not limited to, ice hockey, art, music, and literature.
Goals: To retire and move to the mountains and live the rest of my life like Jeremiah Johnson - but that's just not going to happen. Ever. Not without high-speed internet.
IRL Job: I've done just about everything and (surprise) eventually landed in IT. I'm happy with it.
Bio: Most of my personal amusement revolves around animated and sometimes crude humor. I've been known to sneak a penis drawing in the dust on the back of a buddy's car. I can't even make it through the grocery store without doing something immature... man.